Here is a little contribution for british sausage week from Ainsley

PACKAGING MISTAKE

Trick or treat Halloween kids facing egg ban:

was the title of an article in a regional newspaper earlier this month. the article goes on to say:-
----
POLICE are urging shops and supermarkets not to sell eggs to children in the run-up to Halloween in a drive to counter anti-social behaviour.
Last year police in Cheshire took 1,500 complaints
from callers reporting problems with teenagers before October 31. Now they are advising stores and supermarkets to refuse to sell eggs to children, to prevent incidents of homes being "egged" by gangs of teenagers bent on mischief-making.
----

This is not a new initiative as I recalled a post I wrote last year.
I have reposted this post from 27th October 2005 as i've been busy and can't think of anything else to blog just now

Coming soon....illicit trade in boxes of eggs.

Along with alcohol and tobacco, the supermarket is now banning the sale of eggs to under 16 year olds until halloween and mischief night are well and truly out of the way, due to the increased activity of egg splattering on suburban house windows.
So now, as well as youngsters hanging around the entrance approaching adults to buy alcohol and cigarettes for them, we will have to watch out for adults sneaking eggs out too!

I am amazed at just how much The sale of halloween paraphenalia has shot up these last few years. About 5 years ago the sales of fireworks,parkin toffee apples and other goods associated with Bonfire night was soaring but now it seems that halloween has taken over in the popularity stakes. Almost every child must have a devils or witches costume along with face masks, broomsticks etc.
not forgetting the rising sales of pumpkins from mid-October onwards, they are flying out the store.
The number of people who actually cook with them must be minimal so don't forget once halloween has passed you can recycle them into traditional pies, risottos and soups, they can be roasted and even used in spicy Thai style curries. Uggh!

Happy halloween for the 31st and happy eating!
----

The little girl (nearly three) who lives next door has just had friends around for a halloween party. They did look sweet,as I glimpsed at them through the window,dressed in their ghost and witches costumes

I hope the bigger kids who come around tonight 'trick and treating' are as sociable and I don't have to clean any eggy windows tomorrow

An old ruffy tuffy contracter arrives in Copenhagen airport enroute from Norway to Manchester. He checks in and has a walk around the fairly quiet terminal building.
In one corner near to a Geneva flight departure gate seated just out of the way and with nobody else around he saw a lone middle-aged man, french, he thought. The frenchman was strumming a guitar and singing in a most soulful manner.
Old ruffy tuffy stops and listens.
After a while the frenchman says to the observer "You like"? He answered "yes, I like very much indeed"
The frenchman beckoned him to sit beside him and sang once more... It was a Portuguese Fado song.
Fado (fate in Portuguese) began in Lisbon as the "music of the urban poor. Fado songs are typically lyrically harsh, with the singer resigned to sadness, poverty and loneliness, but remaining dignified and firmly controlled.
Old ruffy tuffy clapped appreciatevly, still an audience of only one. His mates were a short distance way up the terminal sitting near their departure gate but they weren't interested in a bohemiam middle aged frenchman.
"You sing now" says frenchie to ruffy tuffy.
"Who me! i'm no good at singing" he replied
"That does not matter so long as it comes from the heart..you start to sing and I will join in".
At this, Ruffy Tuffy launched into a rendition of 'The leaving of Liverpool'...this being one of the few songs he knew best, it soon became a duet and then finally for a reprise they broke into a rendition of The mexican song 'La cucaracha' with the frenchman singing the lyrics in spanish and ruffy tuffy joining in the chorus and rythmically clapping along.

The time came for the guitarist to board his flight to Geneva, he was going to a conference (a bohemian business man it seems), so he gave his new friend his business card and said "au revoir". "Adios" says ruffy tuffy as he walks back towards where his pals were sitting.

"Hey, could you hear me singing with that frenchman?" he asks them.
"Huh? Aye, we could hear some sort of a din, we thought it was kids yelling or summat!!

"It was one of the best afternoons I have ever spent in an airport, I really enjoyed myself" said T'old man as he related this tale to me when he arrived home early yesterday evening
"and that was even BEFORE I had had a pint" he said

QUOTE
"We've got a nation of people who have one eye looking out for the next speed camera, another looking for a speed limit sign and another looking at the speedometer - which is a bit of a shame, when you only have two eyes."
PAUL SMITH, head of a British group that opposes the use of cameras to catch speeders.

As I said on a comment on Deadhead's blog when he posted about being stuck on the M25 and other traffic jams

"IM GLAD I'VE NEVER HAD A DRIVING LESSON"

An excerpt from an article in todays online New York Times mentions that:-

The cameras detect cars that exceed the speed limit, often with radar technology, and take flash photographs of the license plates so a ticket can be issued. A speeding offense adds three points to a driver’s license. Because drivers who amass 12 points in three years face six-month driving bans, people go to enormous lengths to avoid detection.

In a recent case, 28-year-old Craig Moore, an engineer from South Yorkshire, ran into trouble when, in the words of a spokesman for the Greater Manchester Police, “instead of just accepting that he had been caught traveling above the speed limit, Moore decided to blow the camera apart ”

It could only have been a Yorkshire lad

Thanks to everyone who has sent me happy birthday wishes for today, it's going fine so far considering most of my nearest and dearest are not around just now.

I have had two text messages with the Happy Birthday song being quoted, two phone calls with it being sung, i've had it sung in spanish by fellow geriatrics at my spanish class this morning and no doubt it will be sung again when I see my eldest daughter tonight.

That'll do for me considering I was going to spend it all alone anyway.
They may not be here in person but I don't mind, 'cos I know they love me regardless

This feeling may not last for ever so i'll spread it around... Help yourself to a Smiley..and thankyou

ALZHEIMERS' EYE TEST

Count every " F" in the following text:

FINISHED FILES ARE THE RE
SULT OF YEARS OF SCIENTIFIC STUDY COMBINED WITH
THE EXPERIENCE OF YEARS...

(SEE BELOW)

HOW MANY ?

WRONG, THERE ARE 6 -- no joke.
READ IT AGAIN !
Really, go Back and Try to find the 6 F's before you scroll down.

The reasoning behind is further down.

>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> The brain cannot process "OF".
>>>>>>>
Incredible or what? Go back and look again!!

Anyone who counts all 6 "F's" on the first go is a genius.
Three is normal, four is quite rare.

How did U do?

I got only four first go ....not a genius then

A young man shopping in a supermarket noticed a little old lady following him around.

If he stopped, she stopped. Furthermore she kept staring at him.

She finally overtook him at the checkout, and she turned to him and said, "I hope I haven't made you feel ill at ease;it's just that you look so much like my late son."

He answered, "That's okay."

"I know it's silly, but if you'd call out "Good bye, Mom" as I leave the store, it would make me feel so happy."

She then went through the checkout, and as she was on her way out of the store, the man called out, "Goodbye, Mom."

The little old lady waved, and smiled back at him.

Pleased that he had brought a little sunshine into someone's day, he went to pay for his groceries.

"That comes to £89.85," said the clerk.

"How come so much ... I only bought 5 items.."

The clerk replied,
"Yeah, but your Mother said you'd be paying for her things, too."

Don't trust little Old Ladies!!!

Urban Dictionary is a slang dictionary with your definitions where you can define your world. here
Here are one or two entries associated with supermarkets:

1....Supermarket Pub

Definition;
The act of consuming alcohol, usually bought from a supermarket for maximum money-saving to drink at someone's house prior to an evening out.
"I'm guessing Tara will wanna go to the supermarket pub before going out to save a bit of moolah"

I know another supermarket pub..the bus shelter I pass on the main road to town.

2....Supermarket Spastic

Definition;
An able bodied driver that is in such a hurry he parks in disabled bays at the supermarket
"Jerry was in a hurry to buy his beers so he pulled into the disabled space as a supermarket spastic for the night"!

There's plenty of these around especially ones with an urgent need to draw money from the cash point machines.

3....Supermarket Squirrel

Definition;
The gathering of nuts and dried fruit from the plastic self serve tubs located near the produce section of a supermarket. The subsequent nibbling of accrued nuts which are placed in plastic bag and kept in the trolley for the duration of ones visit to the supermarket, appearing as though they are an intended purchase.....in fact the yield is nibbled on until it is time to check out and any remaining nuts are discreetly discarded on a shelf behind some stacked products.

Person 1: "Are you going to pay for all those nuts sir?"
Person 2: "No, no they're just there for the supermarket squirrel"

We have supermarket monkeys too by the amount of discarded banana skins which are found on the shelves.

4....Supermarket Legs

Definition;
noun.. Slapper
"Cheap and always open".

Jack: "Hey Bill, have you seen the new girl Sharon?"
Bill: "Yeah Jack, but I hear she's got real supermarket legs!"

No comment and I am not admitting to knowing anyone with the name of Sharon.

I've just finished watching the BBC's City Hospital tv programme and have just witnessed viewing what is claimed to be the first natural live birth broadcast on british tele. I thought that it was very respectfully done and didn't show anything too revealing whilst still showing the full emotion of such an event. I suppose if you've been through this experience oneself it is a heightened experience as one can relate wholly to it.

The gift of life....it brought a tear to my eye, soppy I know!!
The name of the baby girl is to be 'Ariel' possibly the female version 'Arielle'.
Ariel is a mischievous airy spirit in Shakespeare's The Tempest
Princess Ariel is the main character in Disney's 1989 film The Little Mermaid,
the little girl's character has begun to be formed already

Ariel is also the twelfth of Uranus's known
satellites as well as a well known soap powder.

p.s.
The baby's father was on a bus stuck in a traffic jam not far from the hospital while the baby was being born but he arrive shortly afterwards as proud as punch. you'd have thought that he'd done all the work

I mentioned that my internet connection was down yesterday, well i've just received this in my in box.
........

Hello,

You may have experienced some problems connecting to the Internet recently and we're really sorry for this.
Some of our network equipment failed which has affected the performance of the service in our LLU network areas. We're working very hard to ensure all our customers are back to a normal service within the next 24 hours.

We're really sorry for any inconvenience this may have caused.

Eric Abensur

Vice President, Orange Home UK

......

I reckon that's about 45 pence that orange owes me for non use of its network for a day. Multiply that by the 250,000 people that have reportedly been affected!?

I met my friend Jane when she was 14 years old and I was 20. She is the sister of my first husband therefore the aunt of my eldest daughter.
We kept in touch sporadically throughout the years perhaps seeing each other once every two years or so. She is an artistic southerner whilst I am a gritty penny pinching northener.
Our trip to Granada was our first trip abroad together and whilst once upon a time I would normally have stayed in a spanish pension and bought local produce at the market and picnicked in the park, Jane was having none of it.
I was happy to go along with the idea as I have been to Granada twice before and to stay in a four star hotel and to dine in excellent restaurants was another side (albeit touristy) of this beautiful city.
Jane spent part of her childhood (Late fifties,early sixties) living in a small village in rural Majorca and apart from a nostalgic trip back there about five years ago she hasn't been to mainland Spain for over 40 years.
She was transferred back in time as we strolled throught the moorish Albaicin and Sacromente areas of the city, the whitewashed walls, the rustic pottery, the smells of the herbs and wild flowers all gave her much delight as she recalled what was the happiest period of her childhood.

The Morning Glory flower played an important part in her memories so I was more than happy to capture these before they closed their petals and went to sleep in the afternoon sun.

It's always good to arrive home, walk through the gate and find the house is safe and sound with all its windows and doors still locked.
It's even better to enter, look around and find that the tele, CD player etc. are still in their place and waiting to be switched on. It's a nice,cosy comfortable feeling.

I'll never forget that time I arrived home to find the back door kicked in...Aaaaargh!!!

I hope the dustbin men come in the next half hour, they usually do. I don't want my rubbish smelling in the bin 'til next week.

I hope the trains and buses are running smoothly today.

I hope the grass doesn't grow too much while i'm away...shouldn't do at this time of year.

I hope my boiled eggs.........

SHUT UP!! Isadora,

Adios, Be good while i'm away.

Hiya, bye...gotta dash...busy beeing.

I've been lazy and melancholy all week but now it's catching up on me!!!!
Been busy working, busy catching up with household chores, busy catching up with family, busy dealing with overdue mail, busy mowing the lawn in between the showers of rain....and there's more, but i've not got time to list them!!!

I'm about to leave for my afternoon shift in 10 mins then I will be busy catching up with an ex- colleague as we attend the local theatre this evening.
Thank goodness i've got all day Sunday free (I think)'cos I haven't started packing yet"
Wheeeee...all that busy beeing will be worth it though as I should be feeling like this little bee come Monday morning.

Byeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

I nearly had a fright, I thought i'd missed my birthday 

Naughty blog.co.uk has changed the age on my profile and i'm not 58 'til nearer the end of the month  
 I must only assume that this changeover  happens automatically at the beginning of the month regardless of what actual day your birthday falls on

I know the ticker on my header says it's two years 'til i'm 60, but I don't really want to get there until  I officially am

In fact I wouldn't really want to get there at all if it wasn't for the fact that I will get my free bus pass (it costs me over £3 return everytime I want to go to town)

And that's the Goddam truth!!!

haiku - roots

roots
down to earth
with one's identity

john tiong chunghoo

For Sure

God made me the way that I am
He never said "no" he always said "you can"

I can be that spirit soaring so high
There I go yonder way over the sky

Be I good or bad imprisoned or free
one things for sure i'll forever be
uniquely ME

isadora x

As Sad As...

I'm as sad as an odd sock
with no one to wear it
as sad as a birthday
with no one to share it
as sad as a teddy
with no one to care for it

as sad as a firework
with no one to light it
as sad as a strawberry
with no one to bite it
as sad as a grey day
with no sun to lighten it

as sad as a bonfire
with no one to poke it
as sad as a puppy
with no one to stroke it
as sad as a promise
when somebody broke it.

Anonymous

Well, that's how I was feeling until I spent the last hour chatting to my "baby girl" on the phone just now.
I thought they'd both forgotten me as I haven't heard from them for a while, but no, her boyfriend is working down south this week and her flatmate is away on holiday so i'm chuffed to bits that she thought of phoning her dear old mam for a chat

The eldest has been in touch too, but she's got an excuse as she is in the throes of moving house

I've realised that the only contact I have with children and babies nowadays are the ones who come into the supermarket with their parents.
The babies are held proudly on display and after lots of cooing and admiration from me, the proud parents go merrily on their way.
The toddlers and infants are usually not so appealing as they are generally screaming or bawling and running into everybody and everything while the parents conveniently ignore them.
I know this isn't always the case though 'cos today on the bus back from town I was sat opposite a mid-thirtyish mother who was with her son aged about 20 months who was sat in his pushchair alongside her.
There was nothing very significant in this except that usually the kids on the bus are screaming and shouting too...but not this little baby/boy. He rocked gently in his pushchair, looked at his mother who then simply tilted her head and cocked an eye, at this the little boy Whooped with glee and laughter. I haven't heard such a hearty laugh on a child so young for many a decade and this subtle game of the mother's lasted the whole of the bus journey.
It lifted my spirits to see this simple interaction (as I said previously, I haven't been around kiddies for a long time) and I commented to the mother on what a happy chappy he was.

Of course now i'm back at home, alone, I've been thinking about my kids and of the simple things we used to share and how they grow up and leave you eventually.
I remember a tape that I bought for them once at a folk festival stall. It was one of Roy Bailey's song selection for children.

This is the chorus of what used to be our favourite track.

EVERYTHING POSSIBLE

chorus:
Oh you can be anybody you want to be
You can love whomever you will
You can travel any country that your heart leads
You know that I will love you still
You can live by yourself, you can gather friends around
You can choose one special one
And the only measure of your words and your deeds
Will be the love you leave behind when you're done.

last verse:
Don't be rattled by names, by taunts, by games
But seek out spirits true
If you give your friends the best part of yourself
They'll give the same back to you

anybody got a spare child or two that I can borrow in time for next year's folk festival season ?

In a previous post, I mentioned that I had emailed the Family in Valladolid to say I could go visit for a month, leaving the ball firmly in their court.

T'old man kept asking "Have they replied to your email yet?"
"No" I would reply "but that doesn't mean anything, these spaniards live by the manana philosophy, they don't rush to do these things especially when we're talking about in four months time, it was the same last year but the emails came eventually."
"I bet they've changed their mind" he says "anyway do you really want to go? a month under someone elses roof is a long time, you'll get fed up".
"No I won't, anyway i'll never know unless I give it a try."

WELL...IT ARRIVED IN MY IN BOX ABOUT HALF AN HOUR AGO

It reads:

¡Estupendo¡

Nos encanta que puedas venir,te esperamos con los brazos abiertos.Las fechas son muy buenas para nosotros.
Perdona que hayamos tardado en responder , pero hemos estado unos días en la playa.
Esperamos noticias tuyas,
Un abrazo ,
......

The gist of the text says that they are delighted that I can come and they await me with open arms. The dates are very good for them. They apologise for taking a long time to reply but they have been spending time (holidaying) by the beach.
They wait to hear from me and send me a hug

That's it then, no hesitating now.
I'll let T'old man know that i've already booked my departure flight

Me, being a bit of a heathen,like, hadn't until I started this blog put pen to paper for creative or recreational purposes since I was at school.( I know , you can tell )

Well, if you take a look at Mr Flighty's blog (on my friend's list) you will see that he has posted a link for "National Poetry day" which takes place on 5th October 2006.
The theme is "Identity" and he thinks it would be a nice idea for all you fellow bloggers to post a poem on Thursday, it can be one that someone else has written or one that you have composed yourself.

I have already found a short poem to post but whilst I was whiling away the time last night, I made up a six line ditty
Dare I risk the jeers and taunts of all you proficient authors and poets out there and post it?
Hmmm, i'll ponder upon it for now

It would be lovely to look at everyones' blogs on Thursday and see a little poem though

So yesterday afternoon T'old man went into town to meet the other two "Jolly Sailors" to finalize details for this morning's departure.
Four hours later while I was at my post in the foyer, who walks in but himself,
" What are you doing here?" I enquired.
"I've come to ask you if you fancy going for a meal tonight when you've finished work?" he replied
"What? you don't do meals, I retorted "remember your birthday and the Finny Haddock?"
"I know" he said "but the other two are both taking their wives out for a meal tonight and I feel guilty 'cos I never take you anywhere".
"A lovely thought" says I "but we had better give it a miss at such short notice etc. and besides you've got to be up at the crack of dawn, another time eh."

He got up bright eyed and bushy tailed this morning but the arranged lift was late arriving, apparently one of the others had slept in after his evening out; so i'm glad we didn't venture out as T'old man would have been bound to order plenty of vino with the meal.

I always like it when there's "something going on" in our lives so I was excited when he announced he was going back to Norway for another month but just now I feel a little deflated
It won't last long though,i'll get my diary out and fill it up with 'must do's' to keep me occupied.

Browsing 'you tube' I came upon this little clip, it's from a book and movie (which I haven't seen) or something.

It's got nothing much to do with T'old man at all (except he will be working on water, he likes fish and he will be flying through the air) but i'll dedicate it to him anyway

This song entitled "So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish" was written for the 2005 film version of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy and is performed twice in the film -- during the opening credits by a chorus of dolphins and during the closing credits by Neil Hannon.